I went to Goodwill yesterday to see if I could find gym shoes for the boys. I know why the school asks for them and I understand it and I’m a good citizen etc. etc. but they will wear these shoes twice a week for an hour for the school year – if they don’t outgrow them in the first two months – and paying money for them causes me actual physical pain. We have a shoe tote with hand-me-downs (if you have contributed, may God richly bless you, seriously), but they are all too big. So I was trying to see how little money I could get away with.

Goodwill did not have appropriate shoes. However, as I was walking past the toy section, I saw two basketball-size Angry Birds plushy toys. I picked them up. They didn’t smell of anything objectionable. They looked clean. I could walk out of the store having spent a grand total of $3, and the boys have birthdays coming up.


I was on my way in to work, so I put the bag in the backseat, thinking to myself how I needed to remember to sneak it into the house that night after they were in bed.

This morning I sent the boys out into the garage to get in the car and buckle up. They bounced back through the door two seconds later, bellowing, “MOM!! WHO ARE THE ANGRY BIRDS FOR?”


I just refused to discuss it as I carried the bag indoors, which is probably not a good strategy, but I panicked, okay? Levi was after me like a bloodhound on the scent, and as the door into the house was swinging shut, I heard Elias say, “Levi! Don’t make her mad. They might be BIRTHDAY PRESENTS!”

I came back out to two angelic figures in the backseat, buckled in without protest and sitting quietly, hands to themselves.

So the Angry Birds projectiles (you know that’s what they’ll be, right?) are no longer a surprise. At least they don’t know about the new Minecraft stuff. Yet.

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